Even though everyone needs to have alone time, sometimes a partner will need more alone time than you do, and this does not mean that something is wrong.

Remember that wanting to have time alone is normal and there is nothing wrong with this. In a relationship, alone time is healing and can help you to recenter and recharge in your mind and body. This allows them to connect with who they are and to embrace the relationship better. Alone time can help the relationship grow but if you have too much alone time, this can also mean your partner is not happy with you.

How can you tell if your alone time is natural or if your partner is unhappy?

Balance Alone and Couple Time

Everyone needs some alone time but there has to be a balance of alone time and togetherness. If your partner always wants to be alone, this is a sign that he might not be happy. This can be a threat to your relationship.

If you find that you spend a lot of time with your partner and he still get his alone time, this is healthy for your relationship and things are going well.

Open Communication

There should not be anything said about your partner needing alone time. This can become a problem if you are not talking about things and if you are expressing yourself aggressively but if they just need some time alone, respect their needs.

Priority

As long as your partner is making you a priority and you do not feel neglected by them, then stop thinking about it. Does your partner want to go out with his buddies after work and spend the weekends with you? This is a normal part of any relationship and this is a sign that he is into you.

If you feel that you are being ignored, this can be a problem and chances are that he is not making you a priority.

Feel the Same

If your partner wants to have alone time and you feel weird when they come home, this can be a bad sign but if you feel the same and things feel normal then it is healthy. Trust how your intuition makes you feel when they come back.

Important

One good sign that your partner likes you is that they are doing something that makes them happier when they get back home to you. See how their personality is and if they are happy and excited when they come home. Doing something healthy and fulfilling for them can make your relationship stronger.

Quality Time

Remember that your partner should be more about quality than quantity. Some people think that they have to spend all of their hours in their day with their partner in order to be happy, but this isn’t true.

Spend time and make it important each time you are with them. If you feel that they give you all their time and attention when they are with you, do not count the hours but count the quality of your time spent together.

Happy Alone or Together

Your partner will probably love his alone time and it is important that he feel happy if he is alone or with you. If your partner is only happy when he has alone time, this is a bad sign, and your relationship might be in trouble.

But, if your partner likes to take time being alone but then loves to spend time with you, your partner can have joy being with you and being alone.

Needing to have alone time is a natural thing and if you are someone that doesn’t need a lot of alone time, it can take time for you to adjust to someone that does. As long as you and your partner are happy in your relationship, you probably are in a healthy relationship and have nothing to worry about.

The post When Your Partner Needs Some Alone Time appeared first on RelationshipBreakUp101.com.

Why does it hurt to be in love? Here are some reasons:

Expectations

Loving someone can be a great thing and you want to meet someone that is going to show you love and be affectionate with you. You want them to love you and to express their love for you. Because of these feelings, your expectations on a new relationship can be high. When these things don’t happen, it can hurt your feelings.

Getting upset about this is normal and you have to work through all of your past failed expectations. When you learn to raise above your past and enjoy what you have, love is easier, and you will be happy.

Being Loved Back

Another reason why love can be painful is if someone doesn’t love you back or doesn’t love you the way that you feel you deserve.

The worst kind of love is the kind where you love someone, and they don’t love you back or feel the same way that you feel. This can cause you to not be able to express yourself to someone and can cause you to not get the love returned that you deserve.

No matter what happens, you have to realize that true love is waiting for you and when you find it, you will be happy.

Giving

Love makes you want to always give of yourself and to be selfless. If you are always putting in effort of loving someone but they are not showing you love back, this can cause you to feel tired and cause you to be hurt.

Being tired and being hurt doesn’t mean that you give up on the relationship, it just means that you take a step back and figure out what you want. You have to stop always being the one to give of yourself. Take time to assess the situation and to find joy.

Comfort

If you need to have someone there to comfort you and to show you love and care and your partner isn’t doing this, it can cause you to feel hurt or pain.

This happens because you want your partner to love you and to be kind and caring to you. You want someone that will be compassionate towards you and will have feelings for you when something is wrong.

Arguing

Love can make you have strong emotions including both selfishness and jealousy. When you fight with your partner because you want to have what you want, you might have a hard time winning your argument. This can cause you to get angry and to get hurt.

Having fights all the time is something that you don’t want. You want to have a partner that understands you and you to understand them. You want to give and take and be there for each other without causing pain.

Losing It

Love is not always forever and when a relationship doesn’t last, it can be very painful for you. You have to understand that love does not always last and learn to look at the situation head on.

Love can cause you pain when you lose it or when you are with someone that gives up on you. You want to love someone and celebrate love but when the feelings are gone, you can have grief and pain.

You are allowed to be upset and you are allowed to grieve. You will learn to get over these feelings and you will see that love is there for you when the time is right.

You have to learn to care about yourself more and when you feel pain in your relationship, learn to face life and learn to be a better person.

The post Why Does it Hurt to Be in Love? appeared first on RelationshipBreakUp101.com.

But when you look at how your relationship is, you will see that things are not working out the way that you hoped they would, and it is taking away your happiness.

How do you break up with someone that you have been with? You have to make sure that you are not blaming them or that you are not trying to show them that they hurt you more than you hurt them. This is about finding a way to show your person that you are both better by going separate ways.

You have to be compassionate and caring when you break up with your partner because you do not want them to be hurt or devastated. You have to understand that not all relationships last and many good relationships fall apart.

Love is something that is important, and it can happen no matter what stage you are in life. This kind of love can change your life. It might have taken you weeks or even years to find love in your life but what if you find out that you are not happy and that you want to move on with someone else.

This happens sometimes, out of the blue and sometimes you are not sure where it even started or what caused you to start falling apart.

Maybe one day you wake up and you realize that you are no longer happy with your partner. Maybe this will end for a few days but then a little bit later the feelings come back again.

You realize then that the feelings are scary and hurtful but that you know that you are not meant to be with this person in your future.

How can you have these feelings? How can something that you loved and enjoyed so longer just leave you feeling so bitter or sour inside? Sometimes relationships will fall apart and not all relationships will last forever.

Here are some ways that you can tell your relationship is falling apart:

Seeing the Signs

Have you ever seen a couple and you could tell they weren’t going to make it? They argue over small things and have a hard time spending time together? They seem to have nothing in common. There are other couples that are not able to be with their partner, no matter what they want.

The reason this happens sometimes is that when people fall in love, something int heir brain changes and it can take negative emotions and change them and take them away. This happens because you have a rush of emotions.

Then later, when you can see things clearly, you realize that the relationship was not what you thought it was.

Being on the Same Page

There are different stages that you will go through in life and both you and your partner will go through them.

Sometimes these stages can cause a power struggle because one person will be further than the other person and this can cause confusion in the relationship. One partner might be behind and not doing what is expected of them and the other partner can feel that they are always in a battle.

These feelings can be frustrating and neither partner can be blamed when this happens. The stages will come and there will be expectations, but you cannot control where your partner is in life.

One partner might be ready to get married and the other partner might not feel the same way. When you have a deep love for each other, the negative emotions that you re feeling can eventually lead to a breakup.

Essential

Your partner should be the most important person in your life. You should want to be together and want to spend time with each other. You should be attached to each other.

When you are essential to each other, you probably have a healthy relationship. When you don’t have these feelings, chances are that you are not in the same place.

Feeling essential is what causes a man and woman to fall in love. If your guy loves you but he is independent, you might feel that you are unworthy or you are lonely even if you are together.

If your partner does not feel that you are important or if he does not seem happy when he is with you, chances are that you are pulling apart form each other and that the relationship just isn’t meant to be.

People want to be needed and wanted and it is the human desire to want this in a relationship. There isn’t an instinct that just happens, being in a relationship means you want to invest in that person, and you should make them feel special and that they have a purpose in your life.

You can make this happen by showing your partner that they are meaningful and that they are important to you. If you have to have your independence, chances are that you and your partner are not fulfilling each other.

Friends

Some people are just better off being friends and not partners. You can love your best friend and be just that, friends. This is okay and sometimes having a friend is the most fulfilling part of your life.

Long term relationships often end but a friendship never ends. People that are friends and rush int a relationship are sometimes making a mistake and they find out later that they should have stayed friends.

Having a best friend that you begin a romantic relationship with will start out good, but it will often end quickly because they realize that they are better off as friends.

These kinds of breakups are the hardest because you feel that you have lost your best friend. Some people can work through these and some have to completely end the relationship and end their friendship as well.

Breaking Up the Right Way

Even though you have a hard time breaking up with someone that you loved, you need to do it right because you still love them, even if your feelings have changed.

You will want the best for this person, and you will want them to be happy. If you have to break up with your partner, you might be afraid that they will not be able to handle the breakup, but you know it has to be done.

Do not ghost them and do not hurt them but just tell them what you are feeling. Breaking up in hurtful way can cause your partner more pain than just breaking up with them can.

Toxic Loop

A toxic loop happens when you want to break up, but you don’t have the courage to do it to their face. This can mean that you will try to talk to them, but they will avoid the conversation because they feel something is wrong.

Chances are that your partner will promise to change and say they cannot move on without you or threaten even to hurt themselves.

This can cause you to not want to end the relationship and it can make the talk have to happen over and over again until you really end it.

Waiting Game

The waiting game happens when you are disappointed, and your partner is disappointed and you both know the relationship needs to end but neither of you want to do the breakup.

This means you never talk about what is going on and you just try to push each other away so that the other will break and make the breakup.

The reason for this is because one person does not want to be responsible for hurting the other person. Both of them know the relationship needs to end but neither wants to take the responsibility of ending it.

Bitter and Angry

This kind of breakup is a bad breakup, and it can be hard for both partners. If you blame your partner for everything that didn’t work out, this can be painful.

This will leave both of you angry and bitter and will take time for the feelings to get better. You will have a hard time when you run into this person and you will find that you stay angry for a long time.

This will happen when you do not end the relationship when you should have ended it and it just ends up with bitter feelings.

Is Breaking Up the Answer?

If breaking up isn’t the answer, you need to find an article on advice and counseling and try to figure out how to work the relationship out, but if you feel that you need to break up with your partner, you have to understand that it will never be easy.

The best way to break up with your partner is to find a way to do it and do it fast and as painless as possible.

Here are some things that you have to understand. Breakups are not always the same and you might even decide to get back together later. Chances are you will still be compatible and if you didn’t break up for violence or for infidelity, the relationship can work out later when you both have matured.

If you have feelings for your ex still, you should consider getting back with them. Talk about things and see if things can work out. But you need to have a plan to get back with your ex.

Time to Break Up?

Deciding when you are going to break up with someone is never easy. You might go through the relationship like a zombie and not even realize for a while that you are unhappy. But when you do finally realize you are unhappy; it hits you like a ton of bricks.

You need to pay attention and if it feels that you need to end the relationship, chances are you need to and move forward.

How do you know when it is time to breakup with someone? You should breakup when you feel that the relationship is not going anywhere or when you are unhappy.

Maybe you have been with your partner for a long time and you realize you want to start dating other people. You can break up with your partner because you feel trapped and there doesn’t have to be any other reason to leave.

How to Tell Its Over

Breaking up isn’t always the right answer but if you want to move forward, do it. Here are some things that show you that moving forward might be the right choice:

No Respect

When you stop respecting each other, chances are it is time to move forward. Nothing will hold a relationship together when there is no respect.

When you insult each other and put each other down, chances are that you need to move on. You can try taking a break and see if that fixes the problem and makes you appreciate them but if not, move forward.

You should never stay in a relationship where there is abuse, get out as fast as possible.

Intimate

If you no longer feel intimate with your partner, you might need to move forward. You can try to fix this by talking about it or by going to a counselor. Try to go out on dates or to have sex. See how you respond to your partners kisses. If you feel annoyed spending time with your partner, this can be a sign to move forward.

Communication

You should be able to communicate with your partner about anything such as finding a place to eat or buying a house. If this is not happening or if you are fighting all the time over resolutions, chances are your relationship is over.

If you feel that you and your partner cannot talk without it being a fight or you feel that you always have to tip toe around them so you can avoid a fight, you might have a relationship that is ending.

What Happens Next

If you don’t care what happens in your relationship next, you might need to move forward without your partner. If you don’t care to fight anymore because you are tired and you have no more energy to put into the relationship, it could be ending.

You can try to work things out by sitting down and talking about what is going on in your relationship and why you feel that the relationship is falling apart.

You might need to go ahead and end the relationship if your partner refuses to talk about things or if you see that you want to have life without your partner after talking to them.

How to Break Up

Before you choose to breakup with your partner, make sure that is what you want. Maybe you should give it one more tries. Let your partner have a chance to make things right and take time to listen to them and what they feel that the problems are.

If the problems are not resolved after you talk, break up with your partner. Come right out and tell your partner things are over. Avoid surprises and be kind when you do it.

Plan

Breakups are hard and emotional and so you will never know how your partner is going to respond. Break up with your partner because you respect them and because it is your final decision.

The break up will put you in control of the situation and you need to know what you are going to say. Try to keep the hurt at a minimal so you can move on peacefully.

What to Say

Always know what to say to your partner when you are going to break up with them. This will help you to get the words out and to tell them what you are feeling. Knowing what to say will help the person understand where you are coming from.

This situation can go from talking to yelling, so you need to make sure that you have a plan of what you are going to say. This will give you peace after the breakup.

Reaction

You need to anticipate that your partner is going to be angry and hurt when you break up with them. They are allowed to have these feelings. Just stick with your decision.

Your partner might beg you and cry and ask you not to leave them. You need to be strong in your reaction and make sure that you are ready for this situation to happen.

To the Point

Do not beat around the bush but get right to what you are going to say. Sit down and tell them why you want to break up and be in control of the situation.

Be Firm and Kind

Even though you are breaking up with someone that you loved, you can be kind. Be kind but do not give in when your partner begs you. Never make false promises.  You know they are going to be hurt and that is okay, but do not promise them that you will get back together.

Friendship

You do not have to make the decision to be friends with someone you are breaking up with. You are not obligated to downgrade the relationship. When you do this, you are still staying in the persons life and you need to let them move forward without you.

Finalize the breakup by giving each other space. If something changes down the road, it will but do not plan on it.

Afterwards

Here are some things not to do after a breakup:

• Look at their social media or stalk them.
• Try to get rebound sex.
• Overthink the breakup.
• Try to spend time with them because you don’t want to be alone.
• Badmouth your ex.
• Reach out to your ex to find out what they are up to.
• Look at memories.

Here are some things to do after a breakup:

• Have respect for them.
• Give them time to heal.
• Find new hobbies.
• Get rid of pictures and mementos.
• Remind yourself why you broke up with them.
• Spend time with friends and family.

Being Single

Once your relationship has ended, you will be single. You have to get used to the idea of being single. You have to know that when you move on from a relationship that you have some baggage that you have to work through.

You need to forgive yourself and your partner and learn to work through things, even if you are the one breaking up. Take time to get over the relationship and move forward in your life.

Focus on building your life and to be a better person than you were with your ex.

Dealing with a Breakup

Breakups are hard and the person that you cared for will no longer be there when you want them to or need them to. This can be hard on holidays and with future plans that you made together. Just because you did the right thing doesn’t mean it will be easy.

You have spent a lot of time with this person and it will take time to get over them. Breaking up is a life changing thing and when you breakup with someone, you have to realize that things change. You will have to learn that your relationship has ended and how it is impacting your life.

Learn to move forward and have a better future and to accept that things change, and that life is always moving forward. Find things to do that you have never done before and go out and meet new people. Spend time with people that you love that have always been there in your life. Learn to embrace being single and live your life happily.

No matter what happens in your life, you deserve to be happy and if being with your partner is not making you happy or allowing you to be fulfilled, chances are it is time to move forward. Move forward with confidence and find peace and happiness.

The post How to Break Up with Someone appeared first on RelationshipBreakUp101.com.

Mistakes in Communication

People have problems communicating and this should not be a surprise. If you have a partner that does not know how to communicate, chances are you feel that you are not close to them or you do not feel loved.

Having basic communication problems can lead to relationships ending and makes people wonder what they are doing wrong. There are some common problems that many people face in their relationships.

Not Asking

There is nothing wrong with asking your partner, “How is your day?” but if you ask this often, it can cause people to feel that their partner is checking up on them or not being sincere. Some couples get to the point where they ask this because they have nothing else to say and this shows that the communication is lacking.

When you say something that sounds repetitive, chances are that you are doing it because you feel that it is your duty to ask, but when you really care, you will look them in the eyes and ask, waiting for their response. Looking someone in the eyes can show your sincerity and show the person you love them.

Saying something different such as, “I love you,” or “Did you do anything exciting today?” can change up the situation and make your partner feel more loved.

This kind of talking shows that you are interested in what your partner did and what they are feeling, and it is a better way that you can talk to your partner without being repetitive.

State What is Obvious

Sometimes people do not say things because they feel that it is obvious. Telling someone that you love them is important because people sometimes need to hear what is obvious. We also need to be more complementary to people that we love. When someone needs something, if their partner isn’t fulfilling it, they will get it fulfilled somewhere else.

Truth

Good relationships mean that you should be able to talk about anything. When things are hard or embarrassing, you should trust your partner enough to talk about them and what happened.

Stop Being Passive Aggressive

Being passive aggressive can end a relationship fast. One of the biggest rules in communication is not to be passive aggressive and that you have to learn to speak to each other without being defensive.

Stop hiding things and shutting down the communication when it is something that you don’t feel like talking about or if you feel threatened by it. Think about how much it affects someone when you choose to not talk to them to teach them a lesson, the relationship begins to die when this happens.

Communication is what keeps your relationship alive and you need to find ways to effectively communicate so that you can get closer. Even if you fight or argue, this is normal, but you have to learn to have peaceful conversation as well.

Not Listening

Communicating means that you talk, and you listen. This does not mean that you just sit there and pretend to listen but that you really listen and understand what the other person is saying.

When both people in the relationship want to communicate, they will focus on what the other person is saying and will truly listen.

Empathizing with someone is also important. When you are empathetic with your partner, it means you care about what they care about. When you choose not to show empathy, it will make your partner feel alone. Sometimes someone just needs emotional support.

Make a choice to have good communication with your partner if you want the relationship to work. Doing this will make you a great team.

Make sure you share with your partner what you are feeling and that you tell them that you want to improve your communication. Doing this will improve your relationship and open you up to a new world with your partner.

The post Why Lack of Communication Can Kill a Relationship appeared first on RelationshipBreakUp101.com.

Men don’t often share their feelings and somethings they don’t come right out and say it for several reasons. The primary reason they keep these types of things bottled up is that they aren’t ready to let go. This can be especially true if you are married or living together because that would mean they would likely be the one moving out. That could upset life financially, with any children involved, and logistically as they would then have to find a place, do household chores they don’t normally do, and be alone for a while.

Sometimes, men will hold back until they get a plan in place that provides them with as little disruption as possible. That could mean arranging to move in with a friend, finding an apartment, or even having a new girlfriend.

Here are 10 signs that indicate he doesn’t love you anymore:

1. He stops communicating. This is as much in a physical sense as in an emotional sense. He doesn’t text you anymore and doesn’t call you. He seems annoyed when you call him and doesn’t return texts quickly. Your phone calls go into voice mail.
2. He is critical of you. Nothing you do seems to be right anymore. He doesn’t like the way you dress or keep up with chores or really anything. It could be that he goes even further into a more abusive relationship where he embarrasses you in front of others or compares you to other women. He also seems to angry easily and is rude.
3. He no longer does anything for you. He used to do special things for you, but now he only does things out of obligation. He may give you a birthday card or flowers on Valentine’s but there isn’t any real emotion behind any of it.
4. He doesn’t want to spend time with you. He either works late or wants to spend his weekends with his guy friends at sporting events, playing golf, or at a bar. This is a sure sign he no longer considers you a worthy way to spend time.
5. The sex is gone. Men always want sex, even if it isn’t as interesting as it once was. If he is no longer seeking you out for sex, it means he is moving on and looking elsewhere. He may be getting it elsewhere too.
6. You are ignored. It is as if you don’t exist. You two seem to be living separate lives even if you are living together. Along with that, he won’t ask you to do things for him anymore but rather do it himself. This can be cooking a meal, laundry, or ironing his clothes.
7. He isn’t involved in your life. Your hobbies no longer interest him and he no longer wants to spend time with your friends and family. It’s like nothing about you interests him anymore.
8. He becomes secretive. Once he stops loving you, he may be finding other interests. That could include friends or potential love interests so he will do everything to keep all his activities secret. This includes hiding his phone, changing his computer passwords, and even hiding some things on social media.
9. He lies. One sure way to know he’s lost the loving feeling is if he lied to you. He may say he’s out with friends but his friends say there are no plans. He may say he wasn’t out drinking, but it is obvious he was. He may say he is texting an old high school friend but doesn’t want you to see it. When a man lies, he is clearly over you.
10. He stops saying “I love you.” While this is the last on this list, this is usually the first obvious clue. He also stops kissing you bye, wanting to cuddle on the couch, and doesn’t hug you anymore.

While it may hurt you to know he doesn’t love you anymore, it is important to recognize the problem so you aren’t taken off guard should he break it off. You could also do some preventive work by addressing these things with him. If he realizes you aren’t into the waiting game until he has his life in order, he may decide it would be better to work things out with you.

Talking to him about it may also give him an opening to express what he is feeling. If he does, it could signal that your relationship is reparable.

The post 10 Signs Your Man Doesn’t Love You Anymore appeared first on RelationshipBreakUp101.com.

Being in a relationship can be hard and frustrating and when you feel that you have a partner that is refusing to listen to you then it can be even harder. Having communication is one of the best things you can do and no matter if there is yelling or if someone is talking over you, the issues will not be resolved.

How do you handle problems in your relationship and what causes there to be conflict? There are ways that you can be respectful when you have a disagreement and you can learn to resolve conflict in a peaceful and calm manner:

Yelling

Communication is the building block of a strong relationships and when you are communicating with your partner, you are making them understand you and trust you. You know them well enough to know what upsets them and triggers them and when you trying to communicate with your partner you can do this without it being heated.

You have to learn to stay cool and to not call them names or yell. Ask questions such as:

• Why are you mad?
• How can we fix this?
• What is really the problem?
• How can we stop this from happening again?

Listening

Talking is important but listening is even more important. You have to give your partner the opportunity to be able to say what they need to say and to share their feelings.

You can stop relationship conflict by not being disrespectful and keeping eye contact when they talk to you. Do not always be distracted when they are speaking.

Differences

If you are having an issue with your partner do not bring up your difference when you are fighting. Pick a time when things are calm and when everyone is in a good mood.

Bringing up things when you are mad, tired, or just in a bad mood can cause there to be more problems.

Tone

Pay attention to how you speak to your partner. Do you understand that we all have a tone? If you could be mild and calm and keep your manners, then you could have a conversation without yelling at them.

If you want to stop problems and not hurt your relationship, do not belittle them or be sarcastic when they talk to you.

One of the worse things you can do is fight over text because text messages can end up having your partner question what you were really meaning and can misunderstand you.

Respect

If you are arguing, do not be disrespectful. Make sure you do not say things that you normally wouldn’t. By being disrespectful, you are never going to solve the problems you are having.

Take time to calm down when you are fighting and do not yell or cause there to be deeper emotional problems. Show them respect by:

• Talking about the problem you are dealing with in the now.
• Being serious and taking their feelings seriously.
• Not interrupting when they talk.
• Being patient.
• Be calm and cool.

Love

One of the most important things to remember is that you love this person. They are the love of your life and not everyone has 100% happy times. Everyone will disagree and that is okay. Learn to love and respect each other even in disagreements and you will be able to make it through.

Tomorrow might not come and so always make sure that you say you are sorry and give yourself and your partner a sweet sleep.

Empathy

When we misunderstand each other, it can turn into arguments? Learn to love each other and have empathy. Empathy is understanding the feelings of others.

Put yourself in your partners shoes and see things from their point of view. When you show empathy, you can resolve the conflict you are having in a kind and caring way. You can show compassion and help to keep peace.

Disagree

If you disagree about things such as politics or religion, learn to agree to disagree. If you cannot come to terms with it, do not try to change each other’s mind but just know that it is okay to disagree.

As long as you are not fighting about something that will hurt your family or your finances then just agree to disagree and move forward.

Forgive

The best thing you can do to make your relationship stronger is to forgive them. Learn to forgive those that have hurt you and know that forgiving is not just saying it.

Forgiving someone means that when you say you forgive that the issue is not brought up again. You have to let go of the anger you feel and be kind and respectful even after the fight is over.

Conclusion

Communication is one of the most important things for couples and you can learn to resolve conflicts without hurting each other if you learn to communicate.

Listen, be respectful, see things from your partners point of view and forgive and you will be able to resolve your problems without constantly fighting with each other. Have peace and love in your home.

The post What to do When in a Relationship Conflict appeared first on RelationshipBreakUp101.com.

Even when we are feeling lucky, life will have problems, triggers, and insecurities, but we will no longer feel out of control. We will no longer worry that the luck will or will not strike. Instead, we will feel we control the luck in all areas. There is no greater feeling than knowing you are calling the shots, whatever they may be. Though people may question how one person can be so lucky, this is just a question to elicit guilt. The truth is, we can make our own luck to find love and luck in other areas, but we have to believe it.

The steps below will help explain how to find your luck:

Redefine

When we label ourselves as unlucky, we are self-sabotaging. It really does all start in the mind. When we are feeling unlucky, we simply have to redefine our lives.

Never Say Never

Making excuses and failing to try is a big part of being unlucky. If we are not willing to make the effort, why would we feel lucky at all. Think about someone who wants to lose weight. They may be handsome, have a great personality, and do well financially, but if they focus only on the weight, they will feel unlucky. They may even attempt to lose the weight, but give up with an excuse at the first opportunity. In this case, as with many others, the weight is not the problem, emotions are the issue. Emotions and relational issues often get intertwined though they are on different planes. Being unhappy in our unhealthiness is bad enough, but talking ourselves out of anything that could correct the issue is even worse.

Identify and Simplify

If anything around thinking about relationship goals sends you into an anxiety attack, then it is time to simplify. Many times, when we feel a low sense of self-worth, we over detail plans and goals so that no one is ever capable of meeting the qualifications. Things may get turned around with red flags being a draw and small annoyances being an end all. When we narrow down the list of qualifications and necessities then things become freer. Perhaps three general goals of being happy, being around others who aid your growth, and freeing yourself from anchors is all you need. If we do not identify and simplify goals then we will keep putting things off and never really moving forward. Things that are over-complicated rarely get completed in a timely manner. When we simplify and set small goals, we can get moving once again, creating our own luck.

Watch for Energy Vampires

There will be times when you must limit contact with some people or cut them out of your life in order to move forward. If someone brings you down when you are in contact with them, draining all the energy from your life, avoid them. If they are unavoidable, like at work, separate yourself as much as possible. Never feel bad about this because the other person is the cause of needing to separate from them.

Connect

When it comes to dating, if you treat dates like an audition, you can only hope for one of two outcomes. There are getting rejected because you simply did not get the part or you get the part and then have to continue playing it. This starts a relationship on a game that ends in lack of trust, jealousy, and toxicity. Instead of auditioning, focus on making a connection. If there is no connection, take the loss and move on. It is not you; the chemistry just was not there.

Set Standards

Setting your own standards is important long before the date occurs. Just as important as setting standards is knowing what you do not want. Be courageous enough to act when something is not what you want.

Lead with Honesty

When going on a date, we often question how to get started. We could start with a sob story to elicit sympathy, show off a high-end outfit, discuss educational pursuits or degrees, or even talk about sex. The truth is, none of these work out well. Instead, we need to stick with honesty and let the conversation flow naturally. Being honest with yourself and those you are dating is what sets you free.

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Tip 1: Take it Slow

Sex is not a race to an orgasm. In fact, if you are only focused on the orgasm instead of your partner, then it will not be all that enjoyable. Pace yourself and enjoy the moment you are in, not what is to come.

Tip 2: The Hot Spot

This is true for both men and women, but guys need to know about this one. Everyone has different “zones” on their bodies that get them hot and bothered. Take time to find these spots that are extra sensitive to touch and caress them during sex. Have fun exploring to find just the right spot and let your partner do the same. Some of the most common are the inner thigh, rib cage, neck, and crook of the elbow.

Tip 3: Connection

The biggest complaint for women is a lack of connection with their partner. We are so concerned about what to do or what to say and where to look, we fail to connect. Your partner is the most important thing during sex so look into their eyes, pay attention to body language, and watch their movements. If her back arches in response, you are doing things right. Remember to stay in the moment.

What Women Really Want

Men tend to believe that a mad dash to the bedroom and stripping off your clothes is the beginning of sex, but for women, sex begins before the date. Women prepare mentally for the night long before meeting her man. This happens as make-up is applied and shaving takes place. Mental foreplay is important for a woman. When she is thinking about sex with you, the body responds. So, to help this along, while on the date, make small gestures or say coy things to insinuate sex without ever mentioning it outright. Play around with the things you say to make them hint at sex as you look into her eyes and smile. Think about sex with her a bit and play with her mind in loving, sensual ways. She will be turned on, just as you. It takes longer for a woman to get turned on when compared to a man, so a bit of mental foreplay gets her warmed up. This is a highly important step.

Dealing with Performance Anxiety

Sometimes thinking about sex with someone can cause anxiety. Much of this is about trying to map out exactly what will happen and becomes overwhelming. When we do this, we miss the point, having fun. The truth is, if she agreed to the date, she finds you attractive and if you have dated a while, she is interested. She will drop hints when she is ready to take things to the bedroom. So, breathe and stay present in the moment to remind yourself you are enough for her. If it helps, think of, and repeat positive affirmations or try guided meditation.

Being Better in Bed: For Guys

As mentioned, women start the date and sex in their minds. Women are not as visual as men, so there is no need to be self-conscious in bed. Be able to stay present, enjoy the moment, and laugh at yourself when necessary. Be confident and she will be pleased. However, it goes beyond this for women. Before ever getting into bed, make sure you both know the intentions of the evening. If it is a one-night stand or working toward a relationship, either is fine, but be clear and make sure intentions match. If not, someone will end up getting hurt.

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But can you discern if your romantic relationship is simply going through a phase, or if it’s something more serious than that? How can you tell when you and your significant other are growing apart?

A stressful day at work, family problems, and health concerns are all common factors in day-to-day life that can throw us for a loop. But if you felt distance between yourself and your partner for a while now, you may be ignoring a red flag in your relationship.

But don’t despair. There’s still time to focus your attention back on the relationship and solve the issue. As long as both partners want things to work out, there’s a way to make it happen and get things back on the right track.

But you need to know if the relationship is simply going through a phase, or you’ve grown apart for good and the relationship is beyond repair.

Here are five important questions to help you work that out:

1. Are the lines of communication between you and your partner severed?

Communication is one of the most important factors of any successful relationship. As with everything else in life, the amount and style of communication will vary. But you should always find your way back together.

If it seems as though your customary heart-to-heart talks and deeper conversations have been giving way to brief, shallow conversations and occasional text updates between you, be warned that you’re probably not just going through a phase. You’re growing apart.

The crucial detail to note is if you know why your partner is acting differently. Grief, loss, mental health fluctuations, financial issues, or other stressors can cause couples to grow distant for varying periods of time. If you know why your partner is acting distant, or what’s bothering him, it’s something that could be repaired.

Rifts like these will often heal themselves over time. But don’t ever assume that they will. Look for ways you could support your partner while he’s going through the rough time. You’ll help subdue his concerns, and your relationship will grow stronger for it.

2. Does your partner say the issues in your relationship are your fault?

When partners stop working \for the benefit of the relationship, it’s a signal that one or both of them don’t care in the same way they did before.

One common way this change manifests is through blame. If your partner resorts to blaming you for every issue that exists in your relationship, he or she is showing that their feelings have changed and they’re moving on.

3. Have you or your partner lost interest in what the other does?

Do you feel as though you simply don’t care what your partner is doing anymore? Or has he stopped asking you what you do during your downtime? Is your free time at home spent in separate rooms doing different things? Do you rarely go out to do things together? All of these are indications that you’re growing apart.

Some time apart is normal and simply occurs naturally. But when you or your partner just stop caring what the other is up to, there is certainly some real distance developing. You need to address the issue before things reach the point of no return.

4. Do you feel compelled to compare responsibilities?

One concrete way you can discern if your relationship is going through something more serious than a phase is by evaluating how you work together.

When you and your partner are truly close, each of you will seek ways to help the other however you can. There typically won’t be conversations centered around phrases such as “I handle these duties,” or “You need to get up and do your part.”

It may happen occasionally that one partner or the other gets distracted by outside issues, such as feeling overwhelmed at work. But when each person is genuinely concerned for the other’s well-being, this won’t be a common occurrence. And it’s a really bad sign if one or both partners start to keep score.

5. Do you no longer see a future with your partner?

This is significant. Having a future with somebody means that he or she will be in your life. But distancing and increased space are signs of a desire to go separate ways or in different directions.

Ask yourself how you feel about that. Can you still see yourself having a future together with your partner? Can you imagine life apart from them—moving into your own place, hanging out with your friends, pursuing your dream job, just living life—without your partner in the picture? This is the most significant sign that you’re growing apart.

If you still envision your future with him in it, what about him? Is he acting as though he’s still in it for the long haul? Or does he no longer want to talk to you about anything that has to do with the future?

Does he change the subject when marriage comes up? Does he tense up at any hint at or mention of kids, even if it’s unrelated to the possibility of the two of you ever having a family together? Or, possibly worst of all, has he hinted at the potential of moving away for his job, switching careers, or engaging in some new hobby or pastime but he hasn’t discussed it with you?

Some relationships end because the partners grew apart. But more often, when partners in a romantic relationship grow distant, the relationship is just going through a phase. They’re still in love, so as long as both partners are committed to the relationship and are willing to work for it, their spark will glow again.

The post Is Your Relationship Just Going Through a Phase? Or Are You Growing Apart? appeared first on RelationshipBreakUp101.com.

According to different relationship coaches, there are signs that being single can be the best for you. There are just some people that are better to be alone while others are better to be in relationships.

Here are some signs that you might be happier being single:

Like it Your Way

If you go on a date and then you realize that you were annoyed the whole time, chances are you should stay single. Maybe you feel that you are too good to be with certain people and you expect there to be standards that are not there yet. This can mean you are happy to be single and alone, at least right now.

People that want to be single will have a harder time being with someone. They are happiest when they are the ones that are in charge and when they do not have to worry about someone else.

They Do Not Want Responsibilities

There are some people that do not want to have responsibilities. They want to do their own thing and not have to deal with doing things for other people.

Women that want to stay single are missing on the fact that they are not experiencing the adventures of dating but even if they are happy with just dating, this can be helpful for them later in life.

Happiness

The best way to figure out if you are happy being single is when you do not feel like being with someone else. When you are single, you will have a reason to be who you are, and you will find happiness in things you like to do.

Happiness comes by experiencing it and you are happy with what you like. If you want to be single, do it!

Supposed to Be

Some people feel like they are supposed to be single and this is okay. If this is something that you feel, bet happy with it.

We live in a world where we have the opportunity to decide if we want to be in a relationship or not. This means that you can find peace and make connections with people on a different level.

If you have a life that is happy and you feel that you have everything you want, then being in a relationship might not be the best for you.

Being single does not mean that something is wrong with you, some people are just best to be alone and enjoy their alone time way more than with someone.

Some people are best being alone and when you are in a relationship that you do not want to be in, it wouldn’t be fair for your partner. Some people want to travel and when they are ready to settle down, they will.

Relationship Wishes

If you want to find someone then you should probably not be single but if you feel happy when you are alone, then chances are you are a person that is better off single.

Having the single life is okay and if you are meant to be single and you are comfortable with it then your independence is more important to you than being with someone. This can mean you are a good person to live the single life.

Tied Down

When relationships make you feel tied down, chances are you should be single. If you enjoy your freedom and you feel anxious about being with someone, then being single should make you have no regrets in your life.

Being free and not having to be a couple is the best thing for you if that is what you want. If you feel tied down when you are in relationships, stay single and do what you want to do.

Happiness

When you feel the best in your life when you are by yourself, be single. No one should tell you that being single is wrong. If you find joy by doing things your own way and you do not have to worry about pleasing someone else, embrace this.

Ambition

Most people do not want to be single and they look for relationships but if you are goal oriented and you are reaching for a different level in your life, being in a relationship can be stifling. If you find that you are best alone so that you can reach your goals, stay single until you are ready for something different.

Good Network

Spending time alone and living by yourself is just fine! When you want to concentrate on your school or your career and you can best do this single, by all means, embrace that.

Being single can be both a positive and a negative, depending on who you are but you should never feel that you have to be tied down when you do not want to be.

If you are sociable and active and you want to be single, do it. If you love living the single life, then you should make sure that you have good friends and a strong circle in your life. Make sure that you have people that you can interact with and that you spend time with them.

Do not become isolated or depressed and make sure that you are spending at least some of your time with other people.

Lifestyle

Some people have a busy life and they have a hard time fitting someone else in their schedule. A persons lifestyle can change based on their relationship and if you find that you want to go out with a lot of people or you want to spend more hours at work, being single might suit you perfectly.

Some people are happy being single while others want to be in a relationship. Either way is okay.

Care Less

If you find that you are not worried about meeting a partner, you probably are best off being single. You might want to live your life without compromising for others and you might hate change. You do not have the desire to settle down and this is all okay.

You are a woman that wants to be single, then be single and embrace it.

Fulfilled

If you are meant to be single, you will not have the desire to be in a relationship. Most people are meant to be in relationships rather with a partner, friends, family, or children. No one said that since you are single you cannot love someone.

The truth is, there does not have to be romance in your life in order for you to be happy. Not everyone feels the same about things and if you like being single and you are not missing out on sexual desires or closeness with a partner, stay single.

You are the one that has to decide what makes you happy. Do not let the ideas of society control what you are feeling or tell you that you have to be in a relationship or be married. Do what is best for your heart and what makes you feel good.

Don’t Say Never

Never say that you will stay single because this can change. If being single is what you like, do it. But never close the door to love just because you want to be single for a season.

Being single is a rational idea and just because you are choosing this now does not mean that you have to change your life for the future. Always keep your doors and options open and see if one day you want to do something that is completely different.

You are the one in charge of you and you have to do what makes you feel happy.

Purpose

Some people really might be meant to be single. Maybe they just want to be religious or they want to give their time helping children or others. If someone wants to be single and they have a purpose to be, this is okay.

Find out what you really want in your life in terms of relationships. What do you feel about being single and being alone? Do you find happiness inside when you are doing what your life has purposed you to do? If you are already happy and single and this is what you want, just embrace it.

If you are single and happy then maybe this is what is meant for your life. Do not let other people tell you differently.

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