Breaking up with someone is hard and when you want to break up, you know that you don’t want to hurt the person because you used to love them.
But when you look at how your relationship is, you will see that things are not working out the way that you hoped they would, and it is taking away your happiness.
How do you break up with someone that you have been with? You have to make sure that you are not blaming them or that you are not trying to show them that they hurt you more than you hurt them. This is about finding a way to show your person that you are both better by going separate ways.
You have to be compassionate and caring when you break up with your partner because you do not want them to be hurt or devastated. You have to understand that not all relationships last and many good relationships fall apart.
Love is something that is important, and it can happen no matter what stage you are in life. This kind of love can change your life. It might have taken you weeks or even years to find love in your life but what if you find out that you are not happy and that you want to move on with someone else.
This happens sometimes, out of the blue and sometimes you are not sure where it even started or what caused you to start falling apart.
Maybe one day you wake up and you realize that you are no longer happy with your partner. Maybe this will end for a few days but then a little bit later the feelings come back again.
You realize then that the feelings are scary and hurtful but that you know that you are not meant to be with this person in your future.
How can you have these feelings? How can something that you loved and enjoyed so longer just leave you feeling so bitter or sour inside? Sometimes relationships will fall apart and not all relationships will last forever.
Here are some ways that you can tell your relationship is falling apart:
Seeing the Signs
Have you ever seen a couple and you could tell they weren’t going to make it? They argue over small things and have a hard time spending time together? They seem to have nothing in common. There are other couples that are not able to be with their partner, no matter what they want.
The reason this happens sometimes is that when people fall in love, something int heir brain changes and it can take negative emotions and change them and take them away. This happens because you have a rush of emotions.
Then later, when you can see things clearly, you realize that the relationship was not what you thought it was.
Being on the Same Page
There are different stages that you will go through in life and both you and your partner will go through them.
Sometimes these stages can cause a power struggle because one person will be further than the other person and this can cause confusion in the relationship. One partner might be behind and not doing what is expected of them and the other partner can feel that they are always in a battle.
These feelings can be frustrating and neither partner can be blamed when this happens. The stages will come and there will be expectations, but you cannot control where your partner is in life.
One partner might be ready to get married and the other partner might not feel the same way. When you have a deep love for each other, the negative emotions that you re feeling can eventually lead to a breakup.
Your partner should be the most important person in your life. You should want to be together and want to spend time with each other. You should be attached to each other.
When you are essential to each other, you probably have a healthy relationship. When you don’t have these feelings, chances are that you are not in the same place.
Feeling essential is what causes a man and woman to fall in love. If your guy loves you but he is independent, you might feel that you are unworthy or you are lonely even if you are together.
If your partner does not feel that you are important or if he does not seem happy when he is with you, chances are that you are pulling apart form each other and that the relationship just isn’t meant to be.
People want to be needed and wanted and it is the human desire to want this in a relationship. There isn’t an instinct that just happens, being in a relationship means you want to invest in that person, and you should make them feel special and that they have a purpose in your life.
You can make this happen by showing your partner that they are meaningful and that they are important to you. If you have to have your independence, chances are that you and your partner are not fulfilling each other.
Some people are just better off being friends and not partners. You can love your best friend and be just that, friends. This is okay and sometimes having a friend is the most fulfilling part of your life.
Long term relationships often end but a friendship never ends. People that are friends and rush int a relationship are sometimes making a mistake and they find out later that they should have stayed friends.
Having a best friend that you begin a romantic relationship with will start out good, but it will often end quickly because they realize that they are better off as friends.
These kinds of breakups are the hardest because you feel that you have lost your best friend. Some people can work through these and some have to completely end the relationship and end their friendship as well.
Breaking Up the Right Way
Even though you have a hard time breaking up with someone that you loved, you need to do it right because you still love them, even if your feelings have changed.
You will want the best for this person, and you will want them to be happy. If you have to break up with your partner, you might be afraid that they will not be able to handle the breakup, but you know it has to be done.
Do not ghost them and do not hurt them but just tell them what you are feeling. Breaking up in hurtful way can cause your partner more pain than just breaking up with them can.
A toxic loop happens when you want to break up, but you don’t have the courage to do it to their face. This can mean that you will try to talk to them, but they will avoid the conversation because they feel something is wrong.
Chances are that your partner will promise to change and say they cannot move on without you or threaten even to hurt themselves.
This can cause you to not want to end the relationship and it can make the talk have to happen over and over again until you really end it.
The waiting game happens when you are disappointed, and your partner is disappointed and you both know the relationship needs to end but neither of you want to do the breakup.
This means you never talk about what is going on and you just try to push each other away so that the other will break and make the breakup.
The reason for this is because one person does not want to be responsible for hurting the other person. Both of them know the relationship needs to end but neither wants to take the responsibility of ending it.
Bitter and Angry
This kind of breakup is a bad breakup, and it can be hard for both partners. If you blame your partner for everything that didn’t work out, this can be painful.
This will leave both of you angry and bitter and will take time for the feelings to get better. You will have a hard time when you run into this person and you will find that you stay angry for a long time.
This will happen when you do not end the relationship when you should have ended it and it just ends up with bitter feelings.
Is Breaking Up the Answer?
If breaking up isn’t the answer, you need to find an article on advice and counseling and try to figure out how to work the relationship out, but if you feel that you need to break up with your partner, you have to understand that it will never be easy.
The best way to break up with your partner is to find a way to do it and do it fast and as painless as possible.
Here are some things that you have to understand. Breakups are not always the same and you might even decide to get back together later. Chances are you will still be compatible and if you didn’t break up for violence or for infidelity, the relationship can work out later when you both have matured.
If you have feelings for your ex still, you should consider getting back with them. Talk about things and see if things can work out. But you need to have a plan to get back with your ex.
Time to Break Up?
Deciding when you are going to break up with someone is never easy. You might go through the relationship like a zombie and not even realize for a while that you are unhappy. But when you do finally realize you are unhappy; it hits you like a ton of bricks.
You need to pay attention and if it feels that you need to end the relationship, chances are you need to and move forward.
How do you know when it is time to breakup with someone? You should breakup when you feel that the relationship is not going anywhere or when you are unhappy.
Maybe you have been with your partner for a long time and you realize you want to start dating other people. You can break up with your partner because you feel trapped and there doesn’t have to be any other reason to leave.
How to Tell Its Over
Breaking up isn’t always the right answer but if you want to move forward, do it. Here are some things that show you that moving forward might be the right choice:
When you stop respecting each other, chances are it is time to move forward. Nothing will hold a relationship together when there is no respect.
When you insult each other and put each other down, chances are that you need to move on. You can try taking a break and see if that fixes the problem and makes you appreciate them but if not, move forward.
You should never stay in a relationship where there is abuse, get out as fast as possible.
If you no longer feel intimate with your partner, you might need to move forward. You can try to fix this by talking about it or by going to a counselor. Try to go out on dates or to have sex. See how you respond to your partners kisses. If you feel annoyed spending time with your partner, this can be a sign to move forward.
You should be able to communicate with your partner about anything such as finding a place to eat or buying a house. If this is not happening or if you are fighting all the time over resolutions, chances are your relationship is over.
If you feel that you and your partner cannot talk without it being a fight or you feel that you always have to tip toe around them so you can avoid a fight, you might have a relationship that is ending.
What Happens Next
If you don’t care what happens in your relationship next, you might need to move forward without your partner. If you don’t care to fight anymore because you are tired and you have no more energy to put into the relationship, it could be ending.
You can try to work things out by sitting down and talking about what is going on in your relationship and why you feel that the relationship is falling apart.
You might need to go ahead and end the relationship if your partner refuses to talk about things or if you see that you want to have life without your partner after talking to them.
How to Break Up
Before you choose to breakup with your partner, make sure that is what you want. Maybe you should give it one more tries. Let your partner have a chance to make things right and take time to listen to them and what they feel that the problems are.
If the problems are not resolved after you talk, break up with your partner. Come right out and tell your partner things are over. Avoid surprises and be kind when you do it.
Breakups are hard and emotional and so you will never know how your partner is going to respond. Break up with your partner because you respect them and because it is your final decision.
The break up will put you in control of the situation and you need to know what you are going to say. Try to keep the hurt at a minimal so you can move on peacefully.
What to Say
Always know what to say to your partner when you are going to break up with them. This will help you to get the words out and to tell them what you are feeling. Knowing what to say will help the person understand where you are coming from.
This situation can go from talking to yelling, so you need to make sure that you have a plan of what you are going to say. This will give you peace after the breakup.
You need to anticipate that your partner is going to be angry and hurt when you break up with them. They are allowed to have these feelings. Just stick with your decision.
Your partner might beg you and cry and ask you not to leave them. You need to be strong in your reaction and make sure that you are ready for this situation to happen.
To the Point
Do not beat around the bush but get right to what you are going to say. Sit down and tell them why you want to break up and be in control of the situation.
Be Firm and Kind
Even though you are breaking up with someone that you loved, you can be kind. Be kind but do not give in when your partner begs you. Never make false promises. You know they are going to be hurt and that is okay, but do not promise them that you will get back together.
You do not have to make the decision to be friends with someone you are breaking up with. You are not obligated to downgrade the relationship. When you do this, you are still staying in the persons life and you need to let them move forward without you.
Finalize the breakup by giving each other space. If something changes down the road, it will but do not plan on it.
Here are some things not to do after a breakup:
- Look at their social media or stalk them.
- Try to get rebound sex.
- Overthink the breakup.
- Try to spend time with them because you don’t want to be alone.
- Badmouth your ex.
- Reach out to your ex to find out what they are up to.
- Look at memories.
Here are some things to do after a breakup:
- Have respect for them.
- Give them time to heal.
- Find new hobbies.
- Get rid of pictures and mementos.
- Remind yourself why you broke up with them.
- Spend time with friends and family.
Once your relationship has ended, you will be single. You have to get used to the idea of being single. You have to know that when you move on from a relationship that you have some baggage that you have to work through.
You need to forgive yourself and your partner and learn to work through things, even if you are the one breaking up. Take time to get over the relationship and move forward in your life.
Focus on building your life and to be a better person than you were with your ex.
Dealing with a Breakup
Breakups are hard and the person that you cared for will no longer be there when you want them to or need them to. This can be hard on holidays and with future plans that you made together. Just because you did the right thing doesn’t mean it will be easy.
You have spent a lot of time with this person and it will take time to get over them. Breaking up is a life changing thing and when you breakup with someone, you have to realize that things change. You will have to learn that your relationship has ended and how it is impacting your life.
Learn to move forward and have a better future and to accept that things change, and that life is always moving forward. Find things to do that you have never done before and go out and meet new people. Spend time with people that you love that have always been there in your life. Learn to embrace being single and live your life happily.
No matter what happens in your life, you deserve to be happy and if being with your partner is not making you happy or allowing you to be fulfilled, chances are it is time to move forward. Move forward with confidence and find peace and happiness.