When someone is in a relationship they look at themselves as part of something great. This is to reinforce the relationships to others on the outside. It is important for both people in a relationship to have some kind of independence. This is important to make sure that you can have a sense of self and also to give you different experiences in your life. Here are some tips that will show you how independence can help your relationship:
Don’t Share Everything
When you are with someone, you want to share everything. This is normal. But, if you share everything about yourself right at the start then what else can your partner learn from you? Love needs to be an ongoing learning experience and a sense of discovery.
When you are independent, you keep things about yourself to yourself. This isn’t lying, it is a way to make you feel free that you don’t have to explain everything about yourself all at one time. You should never lie and if you feel that you need to, then you need to look into the relationship to see if it is where you should be.
By telling your partner all about yourself then it causes pressure. You should both have some independence in life.
Have A Hobby for Time Alone
Hobbies are good for everyone and they give you a chance to get away from the regular things that you do in life. They help us to be creative and have fun. They give us mental benefits and health benefits. Find something that is interesting to you and even if your partner doesn’t share the interest, do it for yourself. It is okay to be independent and both you and your partner need a hobby.
Take a Break
When you take a break from your partner it doesn’t mean its open dating season. There is nothing wrong with needing to have a little space here and there. Take a break, go camping with your friends. Take a little vacation or a trip to the bowling alley. This can help you to find your partner more attractive when you come back.
Learn to appreciate each other’s time away and being independent means that you can have some alone time that everyone needs from time to time.
Have Different Friends
It is important that you have friends that aren’t your partners friends. Each person has their own unique identity and unique people that they like to hang out with. This can be a two way street. If your partner has their own friends, be okay with this and don’t be controlling.
When both parties can come and go as they please then this is a sign of trust and allows each of you to be independent while being together.
Accept the No Answer
If you ask if you can come with them and they say no, don’t get hurt. This can cause you to have strain in your relationship.
If your partner wants to go watch a movie with a friend that you hate, chances are you will be bored and wouldn’t want to go anyways.
Allow them to go out and have fun with their friends without sulking or being mad. It is healthy for each of you to be able to go out and be honest with each other. Even if you aren’t happy with the answer, accept it and don’t be rude.
Your partner will believe that you trust them and will come home and everything will be just as it was the day before. Being independent means that sometimes you have to reject the other persons company with grace.
Dreams help to define who we are. They give us something to work for. When you get in a relationship, it shouldn’t mean that you aren’t allowed to keep following your dreams.
A good partner is willing to allow their partner to dream without being condescending to them. There should always be mutual support with each other and this can build a strong relationship.
Your dreams have to be a part of who you are and if your partner doesn’t want to be a part of it, do you really feel that is the right person to be with.
Be Who You Always Are
When you are independent, it means you are who you are and not who someone tells you to be. If your partner wants you to change something like your clothes or the friends that you have, then maybe you are with someone that you shouldn’t be with.
In the same situation, you need to make sure that you aren’t trying to force your partner to change either. You need to love each other for who you are.
It is unfair in a relationship when you try to change someone. Stand up for yourself if it is necessary and don’t apologize for being yourself. Be true to yourself and require that your partner accept it and love you for it.